Stupid Finger…again.
So I had a finger injury…as you may have read about before. If not here is the short story – one night at practice I broke my finger, not a big deal you say, but I needed surgery and I missed three bouts for a stupid finger. Now you are caught up.
Take two. I had my surgery. I went back for my post surgery check up and the pin that was placed in my finger had moved and I was put in a hard cast up to my elbow. My work was furious at me, many talking behind my back saying I should have to stay home until I can do my job. I may not be able to go catch dogs with a cast but I can do office work and adoptions – the only good thing is that it was my left hand. They just felt it was terrible because I hurt myself playing derby, which they all think is something stupid that the weird girl at the office does but not something normal people do and definitely not something that should cause injury and affect your job (I won’t even bring up horse riding).
The cast finally came off and the physical therapy starts, three days a week I am going in trying to get my broken finger to move, plus the other two that were in the cast with it. They are not moving, I can barley bend my broken one and the other two really hurt. At this time I guess I hit a depression. I was worried and pissed at my job, and I was gaining weight like crazy. I broke my finger in March and it was July and I was skating my first bout, and I figured out it was a year since my last bout (I was in a car accident end of last season). People with broken legs heal faster than me.
My first bout back was great, I thought I did really well I got all kinds of compliments and was pretty happy with myself. Then as stupid as it was, it was the next practice and it was time to see who got the rewards for performance. The team captains always give little star rewards to the girls who did well at the bouts. I thought it was my time to finally get one, First bout back after an injury and I did well. However my name was not called, so I guess I didn’t do as well as I thought. I am not a jammer or a flashy blocker so I don’t get a lot of notice, it’s just the way it is sometimes and most times I am fine with it. When it comes to getting MVP I am SUPER happy about it (those paddles hurt) but every once in a while it would be nice to look on my fridge and see a star.
I think that was the start of my downward spiral of my 2011 derby season. It seemed that whatever I did I was terrible at, some practices made me cry and feel that I was useless and could not skate at all. I made rosters but did not play much and my stupid finger still was not moving. However I figured out a lot of things, you learn a lot about yourself and your team when you sit out a lot of practices. I learned that we didn’t listen to our coach and why he got so mad at us sometimes. I learned the rules and plays better. I can NSO the penalty box if I need to.
Flash forward to my final doctor appointment, or at least what I think is my final doctor appointment. He keeps looking at my finger and saying he wants it to move better, well duh it barley moves at all. His solution is I have to have a second surgery. Are you serious another surgery on this stupid finger, more time off work, more time off skates. The only good news is I can wait until after the end of the season party, because I need to go back to therapy and get it ready for surgery. I schedule the surgery for after the end of season party and take two weeks off work so I don’t have to see the looks and hear the whispers.
The end of the season party is approaching and I look back on my derby season and there is nothing good I can say about it. I played terrible I had the world’s most stupid injury, no awards and no confidence. I did have a derby family that still loved me no matter what, a family at home that understood and a plan for next season. And somehow I didn’t win the best injury award. I decided to just put my 2011 season behind me and remember it for what it was the year of my sucking and getting fat.
I had my second surgery at the end of October and my finger was not moving because of all the scar tissue, but they got rid of it and I was in therapy the day after my surgery. I had a different therapist this time and she really made me work and pushed hard on my finger. I went back to the doctor 10 days later and was sent back to work on full duty. I could not hurt the pin in my finger anymore and I just need to move it.
I had my last doctor appointment on 1/10/2012 and I was completely released I never have to see him again. My finger still does not move the best, but it is a lot better than it was. I don’t have to go to therapy anymore but I still have to do all my exercises and use all the gadgets they gave me. I can make a fist but it really hurts when I do. I still tape my fingers when I skate and I think I always will. I never realized that a stupid finger could cause so many problems but they are finally over or at least they better be because I have a plan for this season……..